hustle hustle

no time for this thing. i also recently changed my phone plan so i cannot surf the internet on it anymore, which will save me some money but is a tough habit to break. i don't have a computer at home so hanging out at work is the only comp time i get. and this is fine. i don't want to be pathetically addicted to the internet, zombied out in front of the screen, thinking talking to people online makes us real friends. it makes me cringe.
money money. i'm so in debt it's giving me acid reflux. it could always be worse.
one of my housemates has swine flu. i'm pretty much expecting to catch it. she lives across the hall and we use the same bathroom. it's a large house full o' people but there's no way i can avoid contact with ... the infected. yesterday was her birthday and i felt bad that she's quarantined in her room. all the hand-washing in the world isn't going to help me. my immune system is for shit in the winter anyways.
one of my other housemates continues to amaze me with her diy hippie stuff. she made almond milk. like has raw almonds in bulk, soaked some until soft, blended them to make a liquid and then squeezed the liquid through hemp cloth. because she doesn't want to drink the packaged stuff, i imagine. it's amazing. our kitchen is a lab of random liquids and fungi and homemade dairy products from raw milk. i'm unsure about raw milk. she's on a totally raw diet. i cannot even steam squash correctly. i can't even make rice that isn't instant, the easy kind. i am domestically disabled.
a night this week...around midnight i suppose i saw the same blind fellow that had such an effect on me a few weeks ago. this time he was on the 39, going to the same area of huntington and south huntington. you know, pushcart of plastic-bagged possessions, massive b.o., the usual. when the bus stopped the driver actually helped him off the bus and cross the street. i wonder if this guy is newly blind. it made me think of the book "american psycho" where patrick bateman blinds the homeless guy. i think that book is fucking brutal and the movie is pussy.
uhh anyway, this fellow fascinates me. he seems so scared of life and just trusts people because it's not like he has a choice.

i guess i don't really have anything to write about. i watched a middle eastern guy and an asian chick have sex like two feet in front of me recently. THAT was a first. i watched. then i went home. that was it. i myself am a robot that shuts down and locks up. no one gets in, nothing real comes out. it's the only way i can protect myself these days.
also, someone was stabbed in the heart and died saturday night like a half block from me. shit knocks you upside the head.